Wednesday's Reflection.....

Tonight as I was walking the dogs I was thinking alot of some of my friends from college back in 1991. I started to think of them because on my Ipod is a song called "Silent Lucidity" which we use to listen too all the time. Actually my old friend Lisa's boyfriend use to play it on his guitar when we would sit around and have some drinks. God, those were the good ole'days! I still remember our apartment, and how I would love to come home from school and Paul would come home from work and we'd have so much fun together...just the two of us. Even back then we did all the entertaining because we were the only couple with an apartment, so of course everyone would migrate to our place..which was just fine! As I was listening to this song and walking along the dark lonely streets, I was thinking about the person that I use to be! The young woman, with so many thoughts, feelings and dreams of the perfect future. God, I was so naive! I would never had figured out that my life would be what it is today. I will admit, that sometimes I do think about my life, what it has become and at times I cannot believe this is the life that I live. I guess its different for me because I didn't really choose this path...I mean, I chose to be with Paul, chose to have a children and then I made choices that brought me to this place. The one thing that I didn't bank on was the type of choices that I would have to make. How things changed and I was not ready or at times willing to accept it. Most of us, go through life with plans of a family, career and job options. I remember being on that path, loving that part of my life! Especially when I was in college the first time.Seriously though with all that said, I would not change who we are, where we've been and where we are going. I do love my life, it did take a different course that I wasn't prepared for..but really..who doesn't go through that at times? I guess what I felt tonight had more to do with who I have become, so many things have shaped who I am, things that are out of my control. I will say that those years the years before I was "this" me.. were great, and I really miss those people who were there with me...I should find them! I think I will!!