We must get out of the mindset that our lives are too follow the same direction as our parents, friends, teachers, co-workers and/or anyone else you may have seated next too you throughout the course of your day.
I too am terribly guilty for believing that I was too be finished highschool by the age of 18, you MUST attend college by 20 yrs old and then married with children by the age of 25.
I was to have a job that made money, a boy and a girl, a small modest home and a happily ever after marriage.
You keep your house and kids clean, go to work, cook healthy dinners, do laundry, join bowling leagues, entertain friends on weekends and love your husband.
Take yearly trips, mow your lawn, own a dog and always smile.
You live a simple life, and follow the crowd. As you age you prepare for retirement, Christmas is extravagant, Thanksgiving is prepared for a feast of many, Easter is spent with Easter egg hunts surrounded by family.
It's the Canadian dream~
That was what I believed I was suppose too do. I don't even think I felt I had a choice to go down a different path. I was too worried what people would have thought. Now, I always wanted a family, always wanted to be a mom. There is no question about that.
But imagine if that isn't that path you want, what if you don't want to get married but you want a child. Or maybe you don't want any of that, you want a life partner to travel with. Someone to share a small apartment and occasional dinner date. Those things are not so unheard of any more. People are living their lives the way they want.
It has taken me a long time to come to the understanding that it is not up to us as parents, friends, sisters, brothers, uncles. aunts and grandparents to determine what might be best for someone we love.
Their journey in life is theirs, and as long as they are happy and self sufficient then who are we to judge.
I'm not too sure why I never felt I had the option to take a different path, why my generation felt it was still necessary to settle down at a young age and have a family?
When I think about it, both my parents came from unstable, unhealthy family lives. My mom made it her life goal to give her children the best childhood possible. I must say she did pretty damn good. We had a cute single detached home, went to our neighbourhood public schools, had the same friends all through childhood, there was absolutely no disruption to our every day life. My mom and dad provided food on the table, family dinners, Christmas mornings filled with toys and love, Easter dinners, spring clothes and new bikes. It was a childhood everyone would want. My mom had worked so hard for this life, it was what she longed for as a child herself.
Maybe growing up knowing that about my mother was what made me believe that "having a family" was the only happy route I could take. I didn't' even consider an alternative.
The only reason why I question it today is because of todays generation. The young adults today are venturing out into the world and living their lives the way they want. Our world is a much smaller place, the internet has provided this generation with a knowledge about the world none of us had.
I can only hope that both my children know they have the option in life to do what ever they choose to do. Whether they marry or not, bring grandchildren into my life, or travel the world and only FaceTime me once a week. I only hope they live their authentic life.
BUT, I also hope they understand that the best thing I could have done was settle down young and start a family. MY mom was right! Family has brought me nothing but happiness and love. I would not want a different life, the one I have is perfect for me.
Well my friends, whatever your life holds for you I truly hope you are living the best version of you. Another life lesson my mother has taught me is too leave this world with no regrets. Clear your conscious, don't hold grudges, let shit go~
Be happy, its a choice.
Until tomorrow friends~ xx
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